“Holy Clothing: Fruit You Can Wear”

Col. 3:12-17

Pastor Deb Troester, STHPC, March 16, 2025

 “This whole ‘kill them with kindness’ thing is taking way longer than expected.”

 This coming Thursday, March 20, is Mr. Rogers’ Day, the birthday of Fred Rogers, beloved host of the long-running PBS children’s show, Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood. As a child, I remember watching it.

I especially liked the opening song, “It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor, would you be mine? Could you be mine?” Won’t you be my neighbor?”

You might not be aware that Fred Rogers was an ordained Presbyterian minister, known around the world for his work with peace, reconciliation, and children’s education and well-being.

At the beginning of each show, he entered the door of his cozy-looking living room, took off his jacket and street shoes and put on a warm, fuzzy sweater and sneakers before sitting down in his chair. He spoke in a calm, quiet voice, like a wise, loving grandpa.

I was actually a bit too old for his show, but my younger brothers were entranced by it, especially my brother Doug, who was one of the kindest people I have ever known. He once invited a homeless lady to eat with him in a restaurant because she was alone on Mother’s Day. He was always doing things like that. I miss him.

But back to Mr. Rogers. When he put on that comfy sweater and sneakers and sat down, he began to speak in his soft, kind voice that was calming and soothing and made you feel loved. Sometimes he talked about how life could be scary, but that you would be OK. His show helped kids deal with their emotions – sadness, anger, disappointment -  in healthy ways. I recently re-watched an episode in which one of his pet fish died. He buried it in the back yard, and a neighbor helped him make a wooden grave marker for it. He told how when he was a little boy, his dog Mitsi died. He recalled that he cried, and his grandmother put her arm around him. Looking right at the camera, he said, “If you feel sad, it helps to tell someone, and it’s OK to cry.” In 2001, when kids were frightened because of the 911 terror attack in New York,

parents asked Mr. Rogers what they should tell their kids. He answered, “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” To this day, especially in times of disaster…I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world.” If we want to know about patience and kindness, we don’t have to look any further than Fred Rogers.

Our scripture today tells us to “clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.” But can we put on compassion, kindness, and patience as easily as Mr. Rogers put on his sweater? Eugenia Gamble, author of the book we are studying this Lent, writes that Colossians 3 tells us “to clothe ourselves with kindness. It is to be what people first see in us. Far from being a mere facade, looking like Jesus on the outside requires that we look like Jesus on the inside.”

So what is kindness? The Greek word used here is chrestoteta, an active demonstration of benevolence, goodness and a willingness to be of service to others.

The early Christian community emphasized patience and kindness as essential characteristics of a life transformed by the Holy Spirit. The concept of kindness was not merely an abstract ideal but a practical expression of love and service within the community, such as the food that the first deacons distributed to poor widows and the clothing Dorcas sewed for the poor in Acts 9.

Kindness is the glue that holds relationships together. In an article published in The Atlantic some years back, Emily Esfahani Smith wrote that according to research, the most important ingredients in a long-lasting relationship, such as a happy marriage, are kindness and generosity. Albert Schweitzer said, “As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate.” Kindness is one of the three requirements mentioned in Micah 6:8: “God has told you, O mortal, what is good, and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice and to love kindness and to walk humbly with your God?”

Patience is the cousin of kindness. As it says in 1 Corinthians 13: “Love is patient. Love is kind.”

The Greek word for patience is makrothymia (Μακροθυμία), which means endurance, steadfastness, perseverance; especially as shown in bearing troubles and ills, long-suffering, slowness in avenging wrongs. Eugenia Gamble explains: “Patience is the Spirit-given capacity to choose not to fight back, even against our own pain. It teaches us that there are right moments and right responses. It is rooted in a trust that whatever we are called on to face, it is not beyond the power of God to sustain us, heal us, and use us. This is particularly true when we face difficulties as a result of our faith and the values that faith calls forth…[It] is the self-restraint which does not hastily retaliate a wrong.”

This kind of patience is found in Psalm 37:

Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him;
    do not fret over those who prosper in their way,
    over those who carry out evil devices.

Refrain from anger and forsake wrath.
    Do not fret—it leads only to evil. – Psalm 37:7-8

Like all fruits of the spirit, kindness and patience require cultivation on our part. How can we practice “wearing” these fruits until they become second nature?

Till we feel as “at home” in them as Mr. Rogers does in his sweater?

Forgiveness has a lot to do with it. We read this morning, “If anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” Thinking about how Christ has forgiven us can help us forgive another person. Jesus taught us to pray, “Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who have sinned against us.” Remember how I said a few weeks ago that agape love is not a feeling, but an action? Jesus said, Love your enemies; do good to those who hate you; bless those who curse you; pray for those who mistreat you…Do to others as you would have them do to you.” Gamble writes, in her chapter on kindness: “Forgiving does not mean saying that what happened was OK. If it had been OK, you wouldn’t need to forgive. Nor does it mean that you have to reopen the relationship if it is not safe or prudent to do so. Forgiveness just frees up your heart to live more bountifully and kindly.”

Another way to learn kindness is to practice gratitude. Colossians 3:15 says, “Be thankful.” An attitude of gratitude can help us to be kind. If we make a habit of being thankful, we will see how kind God has been to us, and it will be easier to be kind to others in return. Remembering God’s patience with us can help us to be patient and forgiving when others are less than perfect. If we are having trouble being thankful, music can help: “With gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God.” For example, today’s anthem reminded us that no matter what happens in life, Jesus remains the same – he will always love us, always forgive us, always be kind and patient with us. Sometimes singing a hymn or listening to a favorite Christian artist can completely change our mood, and help us to be more patient and kind with others by reminding us of God’s goodness.

Our passage this morning ends with the words, “Whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” This would be a good verse to memorize. Can we be unkind or impatient in the name of the Lord Jesus? Whenever you are about to say or do something unkind or wrong, remember this verse–do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus.

Eugenia Gamble tells the story of a little boy named Teddy who was mentally and developmentally disabled. But his disabilities did not prevent him from being kind. When he was six, “his mom and he were at a park for a picnic….Teddy noticed an obviously homeless person sitting on a nearby bench. Teddy went over and sat on the bench and handed half his sandwich to his new friend. They enjoyed that feast in companionable silence and then went their separate ways.” Gamble comments that “the Spirit kindness revealed in simply noticing another person is sacramental.”

I will close with a little quote from Mr. Rogers:

“There are three ways to ultimate success:
The first way is to be kind.
The second way is to be kind.
The third way is to be kind.”

Amen.

Gamble, Eugenia Anne. Tending the Wild Garden: Growing in the Fruit of the Spirit. Presbyterian Publishing. Kindle Edition, 2024

©Deborah Troester, 2025